Thursday, April 10, 2008

Yesterday, Las Vegas. Tomorrow, Dubai? Again?

From the wires:

LOS ANGELES —Tennis Channel is selling the rights to its Las Vegas tournament to the ATP, which could take the event out of the city.
“It’s time for us to focus more of our energy on … (bringing) more tennis to television and the Internet than ever before,” Tennis Channel chairman Ken Solomon said in a statement Thursday.
The network bought the tournament from IMG in 2005, when it was played in Scottsdale, Ariz., and renamed it the Tennis Channel Open that year. The tournament was moved to Las Vegas in 2006.
“The ATP is currently in the process of determining the future of the Las Vegas event,” Tennis Channel’s statement said.


What will the Tennis Channel do with all this newfound cash? Oh, I guess they could:
1. Hire a video editor. Maybe two. Shockingly, people are not all that interested in watching injury timeouts every time a match airs.
2. Start Racquetball Channel. I know, I know: But what would they air on the Tennis Channel? Tennis, maybe?
3. On-air talent adjustments. In: John McEnroe (even part-time) and Andre Agassi. Out: Chanda Rubin, Justin Gimelstob, Corina Morariu. Some might call that being short-staffed. I call it the perfect example of silence being golden.
4. Bring two of the most annoying people on television together for a reality show: "Big Brother with Murphy Jensen and Billy Mays." Don't they both always seem a little too happy? Let's see how they like being exposed to canned enthusiasm for a few weeks.
5. Start offering instruction programs. I'm not talking about that guy and his 12-year-old kid. I don't know about any of you, but I could use some tips every now and again. I know! It could replace "Destination Tennis" which is just a great show -- if you've got a few grand to spend on tennis and a massage. That's a sweet gig, by the way. I wish I could convince my bosses that my job should be going on vacation to 5-star locations.
6. Get better filler material between shows. First of all, they wouldn't have these awkward gaps if they'd hire the video editor. Second of all, that Center Court show is not that interesting, not even in snippets. Every time they use those clips, I have to wonder what kind of crack Gigi Fernandez is on. Yeah, the one who thinks tennis could be improved by raising the net. I'm just shaking my head right now in severe disapproval. "Raise the net." Sigh.

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